So I'm back from my travels for a bit. Overall my venture went well. I spoke for the first time among people who didn't know me. This was a bit more stressful than usual because I found out that people actually read this blog. ULE was great my room at the hotel was less so.
I don't want to turn this post into a complaining rant (I did that already when I filled out the Paypal dispute form) but I do want to examine how I handled things. My nonsmoking room had been smoked in, first order of business was to open the windows and turn on a fan. The room was dirty so I took out my essential oil blend I take to ward of bugs and such and hit the furniture and bedding. I put nothing on the floor. Above the physical condition in the room there was the energy of the whole place. Every time I passed through the lobby there was an irate traveler complaining heatedly to the front desk staff. I just didn't feel too secure here. So I opened sacred space and called in the 4 directions. Now I did something I never ever do. I left sacred space up for my entire stay. In fact I even reinforced it the second night. I put runes of warding on the door (which might explain why I kept having to get my keycard redone every evening). I drew down the moon into the room and called on the sacred wind to cleanse and purify the space. I sang to waken the land spirits. I transformed the space into a sacred den, a sacred den still in need of deep clean on the physical side of things but at least I could get some rest.
All this taught me just how much ceremony could transform a less than ideal space. Had it not been for the lingering bit of smoke and the decaying physical condition of the room itself it would have been quite a space. Still I was proud with how much I actually was able to shift it. When I was leaving I forgot something in the room and one of the cleaning staff actually went out into the parking lot to give it to me. This was a dramatic change to how the staff had behaved when I arrived. This also left me with a quandary. I had planned to complain about the hotel conditions, and now someone had been kind. Well being the sometimes petty person I am I ended up complaining to their corporate office and the booking company. This led nowhere so I filed with Paypal, but I didn't feel good about it.
I was fine weaving light and sacredness into a space, and using my power to improve a situation. I was all torn up about causing trouble by reporting the hotel. However had I not gone the route of seeking recompense I wouldn't have been able to live with it either. I would have felt that I hadn't stood up for myself, and that I was contributing to an ongoing problem for future travelers. Many people in my field call themselves light workers. I don't call myself that. Perhaps it is my years practicing tai chi or my affiliation with both the summer and winter courts of faery, but I see both light and darkness as necessary. We all know that one nice person who continually gets dumped upon. In the past I've been the person who just puts up with something because I don't want to seem mean. This has not been very effective for me. I've alsohad times where I went overboard and steamrolled right over people. This has also not been a good long term strategy.
I think what we need to be able to do to flow through life with grace is to weave both light and dark. Dark doesn't have to be all sharp and hard edges, but sometimes it is. Not everyone has our best interests at heart and we must sometimes enforce our will and consequences when people do not honor their agreements. This is not a space from which to dwell but one we need to be able to visit and pass through if we wish to conduct business while we are breathing. This should help us support our weaving of more light into life rather than distract from it.
So I must become more comfortable with weaving in a dark strand here and there or at least become comfortable with the discomfort of it. What about you? Do you bring in the dark when it is needed or do you put on your blinders and try to walk stoically on through the blinding brightness? Can you dance between light and dark in an artful and heart centered way? If you could weave light and dark equally well how would your life change? What would it look like? Let me know in the comments.
Peace and Blessings,