A Year of

Greetings all,

I hope you've had a peaceful holiday season so far.  We are coming into the zero hour soon.  What can I say about 2016?  This was a year of tumultuousness and loss.  I left a job after over eight years, I lost two friends to cancer, we lost many icons and heroes, and we had the grittiest nasty presidential campaign season that I remember in my lifetime.  (Complete with future moron in chief).

I know many people this year that have had great difficulties, far greater than my own.  The people out at Standing Rock have put their bodies on the line to safeguard the water for everyone.  They have gathered people of all nations and creeds to a small camp to help protect the earth.  This along with the forgiveness ceremony for army veterans that took place gave me hope this year.  There is much in the world that seems to be going down a dark and dangerous path lately, but the human spirit and heart can still shine through and bring us back from the brink.  This is something I have to dedicate my belief to, because to abandon that is to champion despair and to simply give up.  Giving up doesn't sit well with me.

As I have gone through the trials and losses of this year I have had a constant source of strength and comfort in my weekly ceremony of prayer.  Pictured above is the very last prayer ceremony of 2016, the focus this week was to lay down the burdens and losses of the year to embrace the new one coming in.  It's been about 3 full years and a few months since I began devoting some time each Friday to send out prayers to my community and certain clients.  The longer I do this the more powerful it seems to be for me.  There have been times when I am shaking my rattle and tears are pouring down my face as I pray.  Those ceremonies where I just break seem to be some of the most powerful ones, or the ones where I am just so beaten down and spent that it is all that I can do to just show up and shake that rattle.  Those times when I just show up because it is all I have can turn into some of the most empowering and sustaining prayers I've ever uttered.  Woven together in my practice are the powers of intention and surrender.  These two poles are not in contention but harmony with one another.  You can't fully surrender without an intent, and you can't really give your intent the power it needs unless you completely surrender.  This is one of the things keeping a regular practice of prayer and ceremony has taught me, and as I continue into another year of ceremony I expect that lose lessons will deepen along with all the other ones that have come out of commitment.

So why am I telling you this?  Well many of you have expressed interest in doing what I do or something similar.  You ask me how did I make it work? Well doing all the sensible things like reading, studying, practicing, setting up my business, getting trained in various backgrounds of consciousness work will only take you so far.  You have to go a bit farther and dedicate yourself to service.  Like anything worthwhile it takes a level of commitment and effort.  I knew I needed to show up for Spirit on a regular basis.  It had to be something I could do if I was tired, sick, or just plain not in the mood.  Believe me I have been sick as a dog and still got my rattle out and shook it as long as I could to honor my promises.  I have been so exhausted that it nearly brings tears to my eyes to think about opening my mesa.  Which is why some weeks the mesa stays closed sometimes by its request, and sometimes by my lack of energy to set it up.  When I began there was no weekly focus just an intent to send out blessings.  I'm not sure exactly when the weekly focus started, but somehow it is always right.  Some weeks it is clear and some weeks it takes a lot to puzzle it out.  A lot of times it is simply something I realize I need and amazingly my group of participants seem to need the exact same blessing.  It has taught me that we are not so different.

So for those of you looking for an anchor or a way to empower yourselves and community I invite you to create your own ceremonies.  They don't have to look like mine.  They don't have to be weekly, maybe you can only commit to once a month.  That's ok, maybe you want to outdo the Mooneagle and do one everyday, well that's awesome (showoff)!  The important thing is to bring forth that promise of service and share it with your community (whether that is your local community or your extended one from far flung regions, prayers need no frequent flier miles).  Be creative and put yourself into your prayers otherwise they are meaningless utterances of sound in an indifferent universe.  When you merge your spirit with your prayers they come alive in a world of portent and meaning.  In this coming year of great change and uncertainty don't just seek a refuge in prayer create a refuge for others to share in.  Meanwhile happy new year and enjoy a slideshow of 2016's year of prayers.

Peace and Blessings,
Thomas Mooneagle

Waking Dreams in the Still Dark

Greetings all,

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!  I write this early Christmas morning post.  I am tired, but in that good way.  Between the rush of making last minute gifts, this week's two ceremonies, and the arrival of a new puppy it's been quite the dash.

I got to hold my annual winter solstice drumming ceremony in the Louisville Salt Cave (thanks ladies for hosting me)!  I knew this was going to be an especially powerful ceremony months ago I dreamed of drumming in a cave and the phoenix came down to listen.  In the dream there were 4 drummers who would battle the dark.  The dream took shape at the last minute with the lead drummers in each of the 4 directions.  My teacher held the North, two more friends held West and East, but I was flustered when I couldn't find my South.  Everyone I looked at the choice seemed forced and I finally surrendered and became South myself.  This in retrospect was just as it should have been in my dream I was one of the 4 warriors battling the dark.  More things fell into place that I could not have planned.  A man came who sang us a Hopi song at the opening and he had a personal story to share about the phoenix.  As we drummed we all became quite hot in the normally cool cave environment.  The dim warm earthlight of salt lamps was very womblike and above sparkling lights hinted of stars.  We had the best of both the upper and lower worlds.  We had three rounds of drumming and all of us were quite spent by the end of the ceremony.  

I had been seeking power to create the changes for myself, my loved ones, my community, my country,  and my clients.  The ceremony just about blew all our socks off, but I cannot take credit for that.  It was the group and spirit.  My contribution was to listen to my dreams and to just follow along without trying to control it.  As I was setting up I could hear people meeting and introducing themselves, coming together in fellowship.  They were truly enjoying the get together and that made me very happy to be part of bringing that good will together.  It went beyond the scope of the dream, and I know the changes are still working through me and others.  I felt quite raw physically and emotionally in the aftermath.  At the winter solstice we honor the North, the place of ancestors, teachers, and death.  The phoenix lent us its cleansing fire that both destroys and renews.

So why am I telling you this?  Well whether or not you celebrate the solstice or not we all come to a place of death in our lives.  According to the Wandering Oracle, "Poor is the man who dies only once in his life."  All of us die many times in life.  When we leave school (hopefully due to graduation) the formal student identity dies.  When we leave a job that employment identity dies.  When we leave a relationship our identity as a couple dies.   From the ashes of those past identities we have the opportunity to rise anew, bright and shining.  Sometimes it is joyous and sometimes sorrowful, but we rise transformed out of the darkness of our the death of our former selves.  

So as past memories arise this holiday season to either trouble or delight you ask yourself what needs to die within  your life so that new life can rise up.  What relationships should be on the pyre?  What activities or habits should be your kindling?  What action will light the spark to burn away all that is no longer who you are? Be well in this between time of Christmas and New Years.  We stand in a doorway ready to cross into uncharted realms.  You carry within you the fuel to light the way.

Peace and Blessings,

Thomas Mooneagle

Winter Words

Greetings all,

It took a while but it seems winter has finally landed here, or we have landed in winter.  Being originally from South Florida I find this time of the year especially challenging.

I've lived a good portion of my life now in a place where winter is part of the cycle.  As a child in Florida temperatures in the low 60s and 50s was winter.  Many of the trees didn't even lose their greenery.  When we moved I experienced snow as part of my reality for the first time.  The length of the days also varied so much more.  I found myself cold for a good portion of the year.  This was due to do the fact that I really didn't have winter clothes.  I had no clue how to dress for it and really didn't have the proper attire until the last few years.  Some people think me fanatical about all the layers I wear and the lengths I go to so that I am warm but my body does not tolerate cold well, and being cooped up inside tends to lend itself to depression in my case.

So we approach the winter solstice now, the long night of the year.  We are in the heart of winter's country.  I will of course drum at the height of the dark to welcome back the light.  I also have the advantage of being involved with a shamanic weather circle where we seek to receive teachings from weather and better build relationships with it.  This time we went to speak to the spirit of winter.

The spirit of winter looked very much to me like the picture above except a bit more transparent.  I asked what would serve me best to release at the solstice; it told me I should release the idea that I am special.  (I should point out that shamanism pulls no punches when it comes to your ego).  That stung a little bit.  Winter went on to say that I cradle my personal hurts and wounds and think that those things make me special, but they really don't.  Many people share similar hurts, and I am not that different.  Still the cold logic remained to the observation.  In our culture we like to think of ourselves as great individuals.  There is also a widespread belief that to be happy and successful (and perhaps loved) we need to be special and stand out.  This apparently is false according to winter.

I've often felt that there are many people more skilled than I am.  I've felt like there are many who are more naturally psychically gifted than I am too.  So the whole "I'm not special" thing really stings.  The thing is though maybe someone is more gifted, talented, or "special" than I am, but I am the one showing up to do the work.  In some of the Discworld books by the late author Terry Pratchett there is a character called Casanunda.  He's a dwarf whose business card says "World's second greatest lover...we try harder....stepladders for sale."  He is quite persistent and pops up comically several times to save the day and even get the girl (well I use the term girl loosely she was more a geriatric witch with a rather lascivious outlook).  As funny as it is though I think I can relate to Casanunda.  I've never thought of myself as the best at anything and so I've often defined myself by what I lack.  This will not serve me going forward.  I need to define myself by what I love.

So why am I rambling on about my own insecurities?  Well my fellow winter travelers, I am quite sure you have a few insecurities of your own.  You may think that nobody knows the troubles you've seen and nobody knows your sorrows.  Well sorry to break it to you, but your pain is probably not all that unique. However you are a unique being.  What you love and what lights you up and what you do with that is all you.  You don't have to be the best or "special" to matter.  That's what winter was telling me and now I'm telling you.  You are a facet of creation, a twinkling light in a vast cosmos of awe and wonder.  You are one of many and you still matter.  So this season let go of your martyrdom monogrammed towels.  Step away from your sorrows and their insistence that they give you your identity.  We are more than our wounds and our words.  We are the breath of life being human in this time and place.  Here in Winter's country let us bring warmth into its heart.

Peace and Blessings,
Thomas Mooneagle

The Gift

Greetings all,

It's been a full week.  I had unexpectedly taught an extra class this week and had two holiday parties. So I've been running around.  Still I have a hard time getting into the holiday spirit this year.  I'm still reeling from the political fallout of the fall, and to be honest a year of letting go of a lot of routines.  So I'm kind of looking for the gift in all this.

I try not to be too political with my blogposts, but I find it increasingly hard to avoid this topic.  I've followed the events of the Standing Rock Sioux tribe and the Water Protectors very closely.  I've followed the list of appointments into the next president's cabinet.  All around me I see intolerance, bigotry, and ignorance being celebrated as great virtues.  The shapes of energies that are falling together show me quite a dark future for the planet.  I see more destruction of habitat, the poisoning of our water, air, and lands.  I see blood demanded for those that serve, for the profits of billionaires who just want more for themselves and less for everyone else.  I see poverty spreading, famine, pestilence, and death riding high upon the backs of those who have the least, and risk the most.  I see all this amidst the glitz and glamour of presidential pageantry.  So I'm not very merry.  I don't have it to warm my heart as they year grows cold.  I like everybody get down.  I used to think it might be depression, but I realized quite late in my development it was that I had awful people around me (at the time).  Right now I can't think of any reason why the events of the world wouldn't depress me.

I have thought of just checking out; living in the moment oblivious to the world around me, but I just can't do that.  I am connected via this web of life and internet.  I have thought of leaving this land of my birth, but I can't do that either.  (It is hard to relocate internationally).  Even if I could somehow secure residency elsewhere it would mean leaving the people I care for behind.  Still I did look into it and even had the offer of a job and place to stay in Canada should the need arise.  You see I remember history classes and the climate in the US right now is similar to Nazi Germany.  So as hard as it might be I may have to do it someday.  Yes the Mooneagle has actually considered the fact that he may be a political refugee, just let that sink in.

One of my teachers always said there is a gift in every situation.  Well I'm looking around for it and it has been hard to spot.  I think the problem though was that I was looking for that gift outside myself. I have been made more aware of who my neighbors are, and what they really think.  I have found out through Facebook posts and comments just how compassionate (or not) the people in my network are.  I've become aware that I need an evacuation plan, and that may one day save my life.  Still it is a bitter gift.  Knowledge earned is not always a cause for celebration.  I realize in all of this that what I choose to do is going to matter.  I can't just check out emotionally or physically from the situation.  I did that the day after the election and my family descended into fights which seemed to come out of left field.  We never know our impact on others until we withdraw our energies.  The sad thing is they often don't know either.

So dear reader I must apologize.  I try my best to be insightful and uplifting, but this week I just can't manage it.  Christmas is not my favorite holiday and brings its own emotional baggage, but this year it is the straw and I seem to be the camel in this metaphor.  I would ask that you consider what gifts are open to you right now?  Which ones do you have to share?  What has been revealed to you and how can you use that knowledge to best serve yourself and your community?  I'll lift from winter shadows eventually, hopefully ready to fight on, and I earnestly hope you'll be there standing with me.

Peace and Blessings,
Thomas Mooneagle

A flight of birds

Greetings all,

I hope you enjoyed your week.  Mine was full of creativity, so in all it was a good week.  I'm working in my studio again and it is like waking up.  Oddly enough this awakening has also led to deeper dreams while I am asleep.  As I'm making art again I'm paying more attention to the world around me.

Here you see a flight of birds, or what is called a murmuring.  That is the name given to the way that flocks of birds seem to move as one entity in flight.  It is an everyday miracle.  Most of us don't even notice it.  We go about our days filled with to do lists, texts, emails, and Facebook.  We rarely look up whether it is at the moon above or to the flight of birds overhead.  Whether it is by natural inclination, the training I have gone through, or simply Fate (ah yes my old mistress), I look up.  I notice.  I listen.

The winds of the worlds blow whether we are aware of them or not, and with each breath a new story unfolds upon the earth.  The birds mind the wind for it is like the ocean is to a fish.  They navigate it by necessity, and yet I believe they also luxuriate in the freedom of flight.  These past few weeks my attention has continually been drawn to the birds and the winds.  As I left the gym and walked back to my car yesterday I heard their voices in the boughs above, hundreds of tiny voices singing out to each other.  They took off in several groups each a murmuring of movement on the wind.  I knew deep down in that moment that they were speaking as sure as I write these words to you.  They were communicating in their own secret tongue.  What does one bird say to another I wondered?  What are they all so excited about?  What are the crows saying in their cawing?

For some reason in the past few centuries human beings have come under the delusion that we are the only species who talk.  Maybe it is because we feel out done by so many species in physical prowess.  Maybe it is because as we have plundered more of the world we needed an excuse to put us above our animal cousins.  All cultures around the world all have stories where the animals talk. It can't be a coincidence.  There have been times when I have been sure an animal has given me a message clear as day.  I'm not suggesting they are hiding troves of unpublished novels, but I do think we do nature a disservice when we dismiss their vocalizations as just noise.

Part of my thing is to recognize the magic in the world and to reawaken that sense in others.  I used to think it was to bring back magic that had been lost, but I now realize it was never lost just ignored.  We don't pay attention to magic just like we have lost the voice of the birds and the wind.  We live in a cold world of flesh and matter where words are skewered into contracts rather than promises.  Words are pinned down on a page or a screen but not uttered.  How many times have you witnessed a group of people gathered together in silence with their faces lit by the screens of their phones while they ignore the souls around them?  They are deaf to the world and so their heart cannot see the magic in the world. They have forgotten the language of the birds and beasts.  They have forgotten the wind's song.

Why am I telling you this?  Well what I call magic, you might call wonder, or excitement in the tapestry of life.  I'm sure some of my friends who are secular humanists get this sense of awe even if they don't believe in magic.  That sense of pattern and meaning within the world is important.  It shows us the hidden relationships within the web of being.  The world renowned mycologist Paul Stamets has stated that he believes that nature has a language and is speaking to us.  What might it say to us?  The answer to that question or at least the seeking of the answer may have profound impact on not just our own lives but those of all the world's inhabitants and their descendants.

So what about you? Have you seen the flights of birds whirling with the winds of changing seasons?  Have you heard their voices and wondered at the secrets of their songs?  Do you notice the interplay of the limbs of the trees, their dreaming roots, and all who nest between?  Do you read the patterns in the path of their whispered winged ways?  Do they tell of things that are, things that were, or some things that have yet come to be?  It is said by some that the birds can see the wind just as we see the wake and waves of the sea.  Think of what stories it has for them.  Stretch your ears and your heart to the sky and see if any word comes to you.

Peace and Blessings,
Thomas Mooneagle