Sunday, April 2, 2017
I hope you had a joyful week. We keep flitting between spring and late winter chill. I was fortunate to attend a new moon ceremony led by a good friend. As things go there was of course a bit of mischief to be had.
I was supposed to be the drummer. I even arrived early by the statue of Pan. There was a chill but I set up and played my didjeridu to pass the time, and then when I was fully winded switched to my drum. It was getting quite late and still I was alone. Well as it turned out the ceremony had been moved to a different hill in the park. I had to hop in my car and zoom around to a pavilion on dog hill. This meant the ceremony was very brief, but as we stood there under a dark sky with a bit of chill, the mists were rising. Afterwards, we took a candle lantern home with us. I stuck around for a bit and let people draw a rune for the new moon.
Several other people who had been at the circle were off in the distance doing some fire twirling, but with lit color changing LED balls. It was a hypnotic dance of beautiful vibrant fractal light. Watching them practice to a trance inducing beat was magical. It reminded me of a book I read a few months back called, The Night Circus. I highly recommend it. In the novel the circus arrives mysteriously and is open from nightfall to dawn. It is called Le Cirque de Reves, meaning the circus of dreams. Each tent is an act of magical creation, in which reality is sculpted as high art. Reading it made me want to use my talents to create wonders.
I am often asked what got me into my line of work. I usually answer that it was my own suffering that led me into healing. While that is true, it is really only half of the answer. Wonder and fascination are what makes my heart expand and flourish. Seeking after that child like sense of mystery has been the true driver of my soul's engine. The pain and suffering were simply the shovel to move that fuel of wonder into the furnace of my heart.
Years ago when I began pursuing my dreams with a friend, we worked with the manifesting energetic tools that were being popularized at the time. We were focused on the big dreams and big picture, but we ignored the day to day pieces of living. We didn't get much of anywhere with those dreams and sadly that friendship is no more. These past few years I have made tremendous strides in the small pieces of the dream: setting up an office, writing a book, writing this blog, putting out regular videos, speaking at events, teaching classes, furthering my education, and just taking care of all the day to day steps. This is good and well, but I had lost sight of the vision. I had no big dream guiding those steps, no great passion. As a spirit recently told me, "You don't let yourself dream." Now while my overall work has improved, I'm still not where I want to be. This is because although I am still moving the shovel, I'm not stoking the furnace with the wonder of those big ideas.
We are people of the middle world. Below us is the earth our mother, and we must tend to our needs while we are embodied. Above us is the firmament of stars and heavenly cosmos. We get a lot of contradictory messages growing up, "Reach for the stars," while also hearing, "Get your head out of the clouds." Recently spending an evening out in the country I was able to actually see the stars. Here in the city it is easy to forget the majestic beauty that lies just over our heads. I'd been a good little task master the last few years, but I hadn't been looking up and beyond the day to day to the bigger picture. I suppose it was good, I'd been on the other extreme, all dreams with no action and having realized I'd come to the opposite of action without a direction. You see we need a star to steer our life by, a dream, something that stirs the fires in our hearts. For me it is to connect with that sense of wonder and share it with others. This is what makes me a trickster, I don't accept the world just as it is, but rather what it could be. What could be more radical than that? So it is clear to me it is time to dream big again. I think I have a decent handle on the practical steps so now I have to nudge my focus between the day to day and the overarching vision I have for my life.
So why am I telling you this. Well you probably are in a similar spot. Either you are full of dreams, but are not connected to the day to day necessities or you are all necessities while the secret yearnings of your soul are constantly put on the back burner. We are people of the middle world meant to bridge the energies of the earth and the stars. You are meant to dream big and make an impact. This doesn't mean you have to change the world, just your corner of it. Wonder may be my soul's drug of choice, but yours could be compassion, peace, wisdom, or joy. The actions you take don't have to be big they just need to be fed by a big and vibrant heart. So get out your astrolabes, put on your work boots, grab your gear, sing your song, and step out onto the path. Find your guiding star and let your actions lead you there.
Peace and Blessings,