I hope you've had a peaceful week. I can hardly believe we come to the end of 2018. This past Friday I did my last weekly ceremony of the year. I made a slideshow of all of them, it is easy to forget how much goes into all of it until you see it all at once.
As I stand on the precipice of a new year, I'm not quite sure which course to chart. I've been in a holding it together pattern for a while. The shape of my life has changed and will continue to, but I haven't yet chosen what I will become when I exit the cocoon. It is not that I have no direction, I have several projects lined up: a new book to write, new artwork from the clay studio, continuing my study of chi kung, producing my first workout DVD, and offering some of the workshops I've developed over the past few years locally. I simply have not yet set my heart into them as yet. I just don't know what will light my heart on fire. Right now I am making space for what is to come.
I laughed for the first time in months two nights ago. I mean real deep, fall off the couch type laughter. I think that is a good sign of things to come. I'm beginning to long for things and experiences that had just fallen by the wayside. That is also a good sign. Being in the seeker mode precedes the creator mode for me. This year I want to be more conscious of what I bring in. It is not that hard to manifest, it is hard to manifest consciously and wisely. Often in the past I got exactly what I asked for, only to find out I really didn't know what I wanted.
Why am I talking about this? Well I am quite sure you've had one of your desires come true at some point and then promptly wished you had a receipt for it to take back to the universe's customer service desk. Getting what we want is not always a pleasant experience. I think it is a good idea to ask ourselves a few questions. What does this wish require of me (i.e. will I have the time, energy, and resources to manage this)? Will this fundamentally alter the quality of my life? Let's also not forget, will this enhance my relationship with myself and others? Really any change I'm asking for needs to hit on those points, or at least solve a problem I have currently.
So how about you? Are you looking back on the year and assessing the path you've walked? Are you considering the road ahead? It is important to step back from time to time and see what the our contribution to the tapestry of our lives has become. Time is the loom on which we weave life, but we have to pay attention if want a clear pattern to emerge. It's fine to have some background here and there, but at some point we need to make the loom weave something we intend. So in this time of resolutions and gatherings, cherish what you have. Spin the straw of your life into golden thread, and brighten the heavens with your creation.
Peace and Blessings,