It has been a rough week, but it is too soon to talk about some of that. So before all went down I was considering a topic and I am going to go ahead and write about that. When I have more fully processed recent events I will address them.
If you couldn't guess by the title this post is probably not going to be safe for work, or for kids. So make sure you're not on the clock or have left this tab open where your children can see it. Right, now that the logistics are taken care of we can begin. The two words "FUCK OFF" have tremendous power. They are offensive, but they also declare without doubt our boundaries. They are angry words, but sometimes anger is the appropriate response.
I was twenty five before I realized I had the power to tell people to go fuck themselves. This phrase saved my life. I was dying surrounded by those who didn't honor me, who drained me, and made me doubt every good thing about myself. I was constantly being belittled with every interaction. The tiniest remark on its own is nothing, but when it is systemic and unrelenting it all adds up. It was the death of a thousand cuts. I was raised to be nice and to treat my friends well. I also had been led to this group of people for my development, and I had grown tremendously from knowing them. However, I thought that this meant I owed them. I had to stick by them no matter what they did to me. I was wrong. Although they did have one more thing to teach me and that was the healing power of "FUCK OFF!"
When who we are has been trod upon and our own sacredness has been defecated upon there is no better medicine than getting the hell out of dodge and telling people where they can stick it. Some of you may be thinking that isn't very evolved or kind. Well I never claimed I was Jesus Christ. I'm Thomas Mooneagle and sometimes I have a potty mouth. (Except around children and grandparents that is). The thing is, in certain circumstances, telling someone to FUCK OFF is being kind to yourself. There are people who won't respect you in this life. They won't treat you in a way that is decent. If you keep those people around, you are only hurting yourself. If you are constantly hurting yourself, then you aren't able to be fully present in your life for those that actually need you and want you around.
You don't always have to use those exact words. A friend I used to have (yes they got the FO treatment too) used to say, "There are many ways to say FUCK YOU!" They were right about that. It is all about the intent. A good FO intent is more important than the actual words you use. They could sound out of context very sweet, but still broadcast loud and clear what you mean. It is satisfying to deliver, no matter which words you use, and it is the beginning of reclaiming your power from someone. It is not the only way to reclaim power, and again it is not the panacea for every ill. However to not use a tool because of some quaint notion on what so called spiritually evolved people are supposed to do is stupid.
So how about you? Has someone violated your sacred boundaries? Is someone telling you or showing you with their behavior that you aren't that important to them. Have they stepped over the line in a way that you can't let go of? Good news you don't have to. Drop an F bomb or whatever your choice of final parting words suit your situation and sail right out of their life. I promise you there are other people that will treat you better the moment you stop letting others treat you poorly.
Peace and Blessings,