I hope you have had an enjoyable week so far. It has been a very promising one for me. Two new opportunities have dropped into my lap. I finally got a bike lock so now I can do some short commutes with my old (but repaired) bike. It makes me feel like a kid again to ride with the wind flowing through my hair.
This post was inspired by a friend who has been having a tough time of it lately. I care deeply for friends as I have found that real ones are sparse in life at least so far. In the past I have had a tendency to try and fix what is wrong rushing in to aid whichever of my circle is stressed. Which is all fine and dandy if they send out an SOS, but I didn't usually wait for that and would jump into action. I never read comics as a kid, but I sure seem to have the caped complex down pat.
It is all well and good to want to help people. However I realize a lot of times it comes from a place of ego. We all want to be special and to feel needed. Having people need us is alright, but it doesn't build the strongest bonds. After all what happens when someone doesn't need us anymore? Will they not have room for us in their life? When we base our relationships on need that often is the result. A far better thing in my opinion is to have people who don't need you around but they want your company all the same.
We are meant to lean on each other from time to time. That is natural, we are social beings and thrive best in small groups. For all of my fellow empaths out there here is where it gets interesting. You see I am aware of my caped crusading tendencies. I have blogged about them before, but this time I caught myself before I donned my mask and boots. I reminded myself that it is not for me to go out offering grand gestures and inserting myself between people and life's challenges. My job as a friend was simply to add to the pile of the good in their life.
We each have a pile of bad that we all have to carry or learn to set down. It is ours and ours alone. Sometimes people can help us shoulder this burden, but ultimately it is up to us to bear it up or cast it aside. As friends and loved ones we can step in from time to time to aid people when they're about to drop. Most times all we need to do is add to the other pile in their life. There is also a pile of good, or you could call it their bag of blessings. It doesn't erase the other pile, but it does make it easier to carry or set aside for a time. That is really all we need to do for the people in our lives, add to the pile of good.
So how about you? Are you trying to shoulder the burdens of others? Are you addicted to being needed? What would happen if instead of trying to fix everything for everybody you were just a source of good in their life? Would you relax more? Now I am not suggesting you stop helping people just that you put it all in perspective. We're all walking our own road carrying our bags with us. Let's help each other by making each other's bag of good the larger haul.
Peace and Blessings,