Happy new year! I can't believe I haven't updated since last year. The holiday season came with some sadness in my family. Since then I have been busy working in the studio, working on writing pages for my website (no they aren't posted yet), and doing some internal work. So far winter has been mild. Still the days are short. I always miss the light.
So comes the minor holiday of Valentine's Day. I've always had a rather shaky relationship with the day. Being empathic it is rather easy for my heart to be a bit over sensitive. For a very long time I hated Valentine's Day, it was a constant reminder that I didn't have anyone to share my life with. I still don't for that matter, although I don't over pump the day with drama because of it anymore. However there was a time where I would say things like "Valentine's Day is punishment from God for single people."
For those of you who subscribe to a harsh God who deals out judgment and retribution you may wish to stop reading right now. I won't be offended in the least. People have asked me if I believe in God, to which I usually reply flippantly, "No that would be like believing in the mailman why encourage Him?" However if you talk about the infinite enough and particularly if you try to pin your rotten experience of a holiday on a God don't be surprised if they show up.
It happened like this. It was Valentines Day perhaps ten years ago or maybe nine, but a bit back the year doesn't matter so much. Well that's not true I was probably a few months in to hanging out around magical folks for the first time in my life. (When you hang out with magical folks a lot things tend to get magnified). So it was coming round to my least favorite holiday, and I kept repeating my blame of the holiday that shames us singles on a deity. (If you think there is going to be any hanky panky coming up you are in for disappointment). I stopped by a friend's work to see them, and their mother was there selling raffle tickets for charity. The prize was a big lover's basket of Valentine goodies from wine and candies and cute stuffed singing teddy bears, $100 cash, and about a hundred dollars in scratch off tickets. I loathed the sight of the thing, but she really needed to sell the rest of the tickets. It was for charity and I never thought I would win.
Flash forward to Valentine's Day I get a voicemail that I have won the grand prize. Yes I was the proud owner of heart shaped chocolates, 2 elegant wine glasses, a bottle of white zinfandel(which truthfully is more a blush wine than a white wine), the cash, the tickets, and one duo of teddy bears that sang "I got you Babe." The irony was not lost on me. Rather than see the Creator as a vengeful and wrathful deity I think He's (gender is up for debate on this one) more like a great cosmic joker. I know I often feel like the punchline to some mysterious joke. However in this case I certainly earned it, I walked right into that one. It was a nice way though of getting me to stop reinforcing that awful belief that I and all singles were being divinely punished every February the 14th. Plus the scratch off tickets netted me another $20, so I must say the Creator is a good sport.
So whether you are single, married, or some status in between (what does it's complicated mean?) just know that you are loved. It might not seem very comforting minus the lover of your dreams, but it is true. Be kind to yourself, love yourself, and remember to keep joy in your hearts for all those who have found someone to share their life with.
Peace and Blessings,